Stress and To Do's

Well life comes at you fast and if you aren't ready for it... too bad. I typically don't get stressed out, but as of late I have been. I don't even know why, but it started to seem that everything was piling up and wasn't getting done. Responsibilities were getting higher and higher, however nothing was getting done. I have concluded that life sucks. I love my wife and that is the only thing that is keeping me going, yet I feel that I let her down everyday.

I talked to my wise sister and she told me that I needed to turn to the Lord and as cheesy as that sounds, it was true. I was so willing to use the Lord everyday on the mission, but once I got home the desire just left me. Why would I let that happen?

It really started to get me to ponder about myself and where I was at with God and I realized that I needed to step it up. All I want to do right now is complain, but I know that won't help me. Forcing myself to not complain is extremely hard and I almost want to just stop writing, but I know that I need to write to let go of my anger and frustrations.

I had so many to do's in my head and I couldn't get them out so I finally wrote them all down. It was more than 60! SHEESH! No wonder I was stressed! I even took work off yesterday because I was so stressed. I slept for four hours :) The nice thing was that as I was writing all these things down, I realized that I was letting go of my stress. It was so nice.

Monica and a few family members were at a First Aid thing tonight so I came home and went to the books right away. I didn't even really do anything with Zuko. (I feel so bad for him. We don't play with him as much as I want to.)

After doing some homework, I finally did some chargebacks on my credit card because the people we bought the textbooks from still haven't given us a refund. Then I called David to talk about 4x (we made $500 last night starting the robots again!) Monica then called to let me know that she was coming home soon and to make her some food. I made some Clam Chowder, but she didn't like it.

It's starting to get late so I am going to go to bed. I hope that things will look brighter soon.

James